Green Guilt

Perhaps a pretty picture will make me feel better.



So like usual, I am late to an idea. This weekend I have been wallowing in green guilt, letting it wrap around me so I can sulk and feel overwhelmed by it. But my favorite new blog, Scream to Be Green, beat me to the punch! Always late...

Seriously though. I am totally overwhelmed with the prospect of my environmental decisions, and the guilt I feel that is beginning to become overwhelming.

A small sampling of my latest thoughts:

Sushi. Yes, we live within 100 miles of the San Francisco bay (does that even matter?), but most likely the fish we eat is either overharvested or farmed.

I've begun paying attention to what's in my personal products - you know - the shampoos, conditioners, makeup...etc. OMG. My mascara has every bad chemical you're supposed to avoid. We know better when it comes to our food, but now I'm terrified about what's in everything else. And all the plastic in our house! Yikes. Sigh. Yikes.

Bamboo clothing seems like a good alternative, until you realize the bamboo fibers have to take a chemical bath to get them to be soft enough to weave as clothing. Organic cotton doesn't grow in these parts, so it has to take a trip across the country to get into my little paws.

We watched the Story of Stuff last night (I've been avoiding it kinda, but have seen the link countless times from folks like you!), and want so desperately to be able to make a difference. But I just don't know that we can.

Did you know that when they survey the cord blood of newborns, it contains 200+ man made synthetic chemicals like parabens and other horrible nasties? Reminds me of the food chain part of Story of Stuff. Breast milk. Being a woman of reproductive age, this is a terrifying reminder of how (and please excuse the language I'm about to use, I swear like a trucker in my "real life" but try to keep it off my blog as much as possible) fucked up our country is. Royally. Our priorities are so skewed towards greed that it makes me want to give up.

Chris: "You're being over dramatic again."

Today I started reading The Omnivore's Dilemma by Michael Pollan (and it's about time I did!), and that certainly hasn't helped the guilt part. And now I understand why y'all came out of the woodwork to let me know "certified organic" is a load of bull shit! Wow. I am so glad we're going to produce our own fruits and vegetables, but meat? That's another battle we now need to fight.

I'm frustrated because I live in a culture where I can't opt out. I am a part of the consumption process whether I like to be or not. I can't opt out. I can do as much as I want, but I'm still at the mercy of big business and the consumption process and our terrible government policies that protect consumption as our way of life.

I don't feel like what I'm doing is pointless (yet), and I certainly hope I never get to that point either. We need lots of good people to "fight the good" fight, but at what point did our country lose the mentality of "government of the people, by the people, for the people" ???

Makes me want to do more. At least I think it does.